Today I am feeling down! I have been sluggish and underperforming the whole day and I was not able to make any money the whole day today. It felt weird! Not being able to make money unintentionally! When I pre plan a day off, I essentially etch into my head that, I will not be making money and then I come to peace with it. This is not what was happening today.
That being said, I have not been feeling satisfied that I am not making money while trying to build things to make me more money (there is a beautiful word for this unfortunatly it eludes me). It feels like a catch 22 moment. I believe that not having somebody to help me and take over the reigns while I am not around is starting to cost me more that just simply not being around or being around all the time. This feeling is greatly amplified now that I am currently under the weather.
My heart has come to the conclusion that I need help and trying to run a business by my self is both fun and exciting while simultaneously also a heavy load to bare. There is simply too much to do all the time, complaining about all that needs to be done doesn’t get the job done and doing all that needs to be done alone leads me to consistent burn outs, and those are never fun!
I guess the next step in my journey is to figure out, how to get help from someone else who isn’t related to me, has knowledge of things that I don’t have, has time on their has and will not want to charge me an arm and a leg just to help me out a bit? Such complex and convoluted problems I create for myself! ( I promise I am laughing and not crying.)
So far, I have realized that, talking to a person that already shares a similar sentiment and ideal as you is far easier than, having to get a person to believe in you, then building sentiments and ideals into said person. Even more amazing is when a person has a vested interest in what you are doing, they skew a majority of their decisions in favour of the things that will give them a kickback. Basically people need things to serve them before they “support” something. HUMANS ARE SELFISH! THEY NEED THEIR DESIRES AND WISHES SERVED BEFORE THEY “STAND BEHIND A PRODUCT/SERVICE/PERSON”.
I tried my hand at short term investing nasdaq 100 futures cfd and S&P 500 futures cfd assets today. I lost too much money chasing and giving space for the assets to breath and “bounce back”. Sometimes it is just easier to cut losses and sometimes protect how far you have come by not accepting to take a step back in what you are currently involved in. Ok now I am just ranting incoherently.
Slowly uncovering the world around me and most importantly the world withing my head that I have seen, has tried to kill me.
within my brain 